Be afraid, be very afraid

(if you are enrolled in my class anyway)

So my students are just plain old trouble this quarter. Not only are there way to many of them, but they've also had more than enough "issues" to make up a magazine subscription!

First there was A, who apparently didn't realize that enrolling in a class actually meant that he was responsible for doing the assignments for said class, so neglected to turn anything in until I got the department police to track him down and threaten to fail him or withdraw him from the course immediately if he didn't answer one of my many inquiring emails. He's now fine, but he brings with him to our meetings a million arcane questions about writing. I don't necessarily mind answering them, except that he is scheduled for 30 minutes, (which is supposed to 20 to meet and then a few to make notes in his file. He routinely gobbles up 40 or 45 minutes, which throws me off course for the rest of my day. And these questions are so minor and obscure, and in the greater scheme of the pass no pass course, make very very little difference for him. Of course, I can't tell him that, but it's a total damned if you do, damned if you don't situation. First he wasn't doing enough work, now he's overcompensating in a big way. It wouldn't matter so much if there were 31 other people to deal with.

Then there was B, whose internship may or may not have been cancelled during the second week of classes. The show that he was working for was definitely cancelled. The question that we have thus far been unable to answer is what did he know when? He didn't notify us, we found out almost by accident. He went on as if there was no problem. This has caused numerous issues in the past few weeks because if he knew and didn't tell us (which is my suspicion at this point), he's in big trouble with the university. Even if he didn't know, he didn't do enough work to pass the course before the position came to a grinding halt. Initially, we were going to let him write another paper (about the ethics of the situation and academic honesty) so that he could finish out the term without withdrawing from the class. Now it looks like, in addition to being possibly subject to disciplinary action, the dean thinks he should have to drop. I don't know yet what the outcome of this will be but to say that it has been a MAJOR pain in the ass, is about the understatement of the quarter.

Turn your attention now to student , whom I haven't seen in so long that I forgot she was actually enrolled in the course and didn't recognize her when she finally came in this afternoon. (This is a real problem when it is an independent study course that requires meeting with me every other week). I had to explain to her why her lapse in attendance was an issue, and why she needs to make a serious adjustment if she expects to pass the course at this stage of the game (oh, and by the way, she wants to enroll again the my summer version--color me thrilled!--not.)

And finally student D, who came in this afternoon (and who has been one of the more enthusiastic and eager students of the term), and proceeded to tell me that his internship had been terminated because he was caught illegally downloading unreleased copyrighted material at his internship (he was working in the music industry). He was fired on the spot. He knows that what he did was stupid, and he's crushed, and yet he seems to hold out hope that if he can just apologize enough times to the right person, that they'll hire him back. I didn't have the heart to tell him that there was no way in hell that he'd ever work there again, but it's the truth. He may well have to drop the course too, but at least he told me about it and won't have to worry about disciplinary action from the university.

I guess the good news is that after today, I may be down to 30 students, maybe even 29 . . . But I'm wondering what other debacles are awaiting my students in the last few weeks of the term. it seems like there has been something for a different person every week for the last month, so I wonder who is next? and what awful fate they're about the encounter. . .